Let’s get to it. The teams get the first clue and they are taking a ferry to Ireland. The Roller Moms and Max were discussing how Max and Katie had U-turned the Moms and I loved Beth’s attitude. She basically said this is a game and we would’ve done the same thing to you. Finally, there’s an adult on one of these shows.
The Road Block is first. It was “Bog Snorkeling,” which was basically snorkeling through 100 yards of funky, cold brown water in less than four minutes. This idea was apparently conceived during drinking. Hmm, what a surprise. Not thinking we’ll see this one in the Olympics anytime … Continue reading ]]>
Katie and Max came in first last week, so they leave first. Ford must’ve complained that Katie didn’t look impressed enough with winning that Ford Focus last week, so they decided to reshoot those two with their new cars again. Katie still doesn’t look all that impressed, so that was a real waste. Although they caught Max climbing in and out of every orifice of his new car, chattering on like a five year old, so I’m sure they’re happy.
First clue says that the teams are heading to Edinburgh, Scotland. Meghan, Joey and the Roller Moms think they get the first flight landing at 1pm, while the other teams are landing at 4pm. … Continue reading ]]>
Teams are off to Germany. Apparently, German trains are much like New York subways. You leave a bag for two seconds, it will disappear. Thieves will sniff that lonely bag out like sharks with blood in the water. Bates’s bag was gone with the wind, though luckily, he had his passport right with him. Of course, Jen has to saunter over with her top two buttons unbuttoned to put her two cents in. She asks if he needs anything and you just knew some kind of sexual innuendo was coming. And, she didn’t disappoint. She asked him if he needed to borrow one of her thongs. … Continue reading ]]>
Let’s get right to it. Bates and Anthony are off first, having come in first for the second time in a row. The teams get their first clue and find out that they are flying to Switzerland. Bates and Anthony start right away with their flirting with the Country Girls and tease them about whether they’ve ever had boyfriends before without teeth or that wear fanny packs. The girls seem to eat it right up. Honestly, I have no clue why these two pretty blondes are still talking to guys without teeth that wear fanny packs, but whatever.
Most of this episode I won’t bore you by summarizing. We seemed to be stuck in train travel hell for most of the time. Train to Grindelwald. Train to Interlaken. (Missed by Joey and Meghan and Mona and Beth, though they caught up anyway). Train right up the Alps. Train to yet another station to find a mountain rescue guide. … Continue reading ]]>
Anyway, Bates and Anthony were off first. These two seem to think they are much funnier than they actually are. One of them (who cares which, really) says while he was sleeping he wasn’t counting sheep, he was counting lions. Then, they both laugh like Beavis and Butthead or something. Get it, because they are in Africa…they are COUNTING LIONS? Hilarious stuff, guys. Sounds like a joke that my 4 … Continue reading ]]>
Anyway, the teams get their first clue and they are flying to Botswana. Winnie and Pam are worried that Meghan and Joey are going to hold it against them that they U-turned them. The whole thing was supposedly anonymous but everyone seems to know who U-turned both teams anyway. Pam and Winnie tell Meghan and Joey to take it as a compliment because they think they are good racers, but Meghan and Joey seem to know that there was some kind of pact with multiple teams against them. I totally screwed up last week too because I don’t think I realized that Meghan and Joey HAD U-turned Chuck and Winona. So here I make fun of Chuck like he’s a complete … Continue reading ]]>
Anyway, we’re back where they left us: in Bali. Dave and Connor are first and read the clue that the teams are headed for Hanoi, Vietnam and that there’s a U-turn on this leg. Dave and Connor are in trouble because Dave’s doctor at home says he needs … Continue reading ]]>
Anyway, back to the show. The teams are arriving at the pit stop. They get the bad news that they are still racing and need to head to their next task in Bali. Each team was like “Yay!” but you could tell that not one of them wanted to keep going. That was especially the case for Dave, who’s still hobbling around on crutches. Honestly, kind of sick of hearing about his stupid leg / foot / ACL now. Whatever. Quit crying about it already. I’m actually kind of missing all the … Continue reading ]]>
The first clue reveals that the teams are flying 3,000 miles … Continue reading ]]>
The show starts with the biggest *ss kiss session ever. Jessica and John sit around like a king and queen while the other teams feed them grapes and fan their faces. Dave and Connor take about two seconds to come over and kiss butt, while of course, reminding them to give them that second Express Pass again. I mean, who knows when someone’s suffered sudden head trauma and may have forgotten something in the last minute or so. Please Dave, feel free to remind everyone 15 or 16 times per show. John finally tells Dave to shut his pie hole already because they want to keep the alliance quiet. That was pretty ridiculous … Continue reading ]]>