Big Brother

Big Brother Finale Recap – 9/23/15

Reality Steve — Thu, 24 Sep 2015 04:01:51 +0000

FINALE NIGHT!!!!!!

Julie lets us know that it’s been 98 days and I’m in shock because it’s felt more like 4,298 days to me. This has been one long and exhausting season, but let’s at least see if we can end on a high note, see someone deserving or semi-deserving win, and wrap this b!tch up…

Before we get to the meat of the episode, I’ll just take a quick moment to say thank you to everyone for reading. Thanks to everyone who followed along with me on Twitter and to everyone who emailed me for whatever reason. I think out of all seasons I did this blog, this was the least responsive one, but I’m going to ride my HUUUUUUUUUUUUGE ego here and say that’s because of the houseguests/season and not because I started to suck as a recap artist. And yes, recapping reality TV is an art, don’t try and take that away from me. But anyway, thank you so much and let’s hope that next season can come back a little stronger … Continue reading →

Big Brother Recap – 9/21/15

Reality Steve — Mon, 21 Sep 2015 03:57:23 +0000

So, I won’t blame you if you don’t bother reading this recap. What a lame episode. I’ll leave a disclaimer here that this is going to be extremely short, considering NOTHING happened worth talking about. I mean, even the flashback scenes were all scenes we’ve already seen before. How lame is CBS for not wanting to do any work and cut film of sh!t we haven’t seen before. Your job isn’t too make your job easier, it’s to keep us entertained. Thanks for not doing your job. But, I still have to do mine, so let’s see what we have here.

Vanessa pretty much thinks she won the game already. She believes both Steve and Liz are going to take her to the final two, and she’s probably right. Although, I do think Steve MIGHT take Liz, just because he assumes he has a better chance of winning against her, which is probably true, even though two votes are automatically not his. Another although, Steve has no chance at winning the game against these two. … Continue reading →

Big Brother Recap – 9/17/15

Reality Steve — Thu, 17 Sep 2015 15:25:37 +0000

Julie lets the houseguests in on the joke that it’s a surprise eviction “episode” tonight and by the end of the 60 minutes, there will be a Veto comp, ceremony, eviction vote, and HoH. The joke is that it’s not really 60 minutes for the houseguests, so there’s no real reason for Julie to tell the houseguests this like it’s live or anything. But, they get all amped up for the “show” and we move on…

Speaking of surprises, Steve is actually surprised that Vanessa kept Austin and Liz safe over him and John…or at least she kept them off the block, I should say. They’re not safe by any means, since either Steve or John could win the Veto and switch everything up. And Steve shouldn’t be surprised one bit by Vanessa doing that as she’s REPEATEDLY shown Steve that she’s playing the game with Liztin more than she is Jeve (Steve and John together?!?). Come on Steve, she’s 100% doing everything she can to keep everyone on her side as long as possible … Continue reading →

Big Brother Recap – 9/14/15

Reality Steve — Wed, 16 Sep 2015 15:29:07 +0000

So…yet another Sunday night episode where we’re clearing up who wins HoH. And the only real observation I have to make from the comp is that yes, John, your resume does look terrible on paper. And when spoken out loud. You have won some Veto’s, yes, but for whatever reason, the jury never cares much about people who have won ONLY Veto’s…it’s all about having that HoH key around your neck all week, and several other weeks throughout the season. You’ve won zero, so sure, start winning them now…

…which, of course he doesn’t as Vanessa pulls out the win over him by a narrow margin. Now, even though we’ve all felt as if Vanessa had to choose sides many other weeks throughout the season, THIS week she’s definitely going to have to choose sides as there are only two sides left, with her pointing out every so weirdly that she’s up against two showmances and she’s the fifth wheel in the house. Funny how she feels that way when she also feels as if … Continue reading →

Big Brother Recap – 9/11/15

Reality Steve — Fri, 11 Sep 2015 16:02:50 +0000

So…it only took 632 episodes of this season before it started getting interesting! All it took was someone FINALLY having the balls to make the move everyone else should have been making all season long by trying to break up Austin and Liz, as well as Austin and the twin sisters. In all seriousness, though, if Steve hadn’t put two of them up on the block together, I’m fairly certain everyone in America would have rioted. Even if they don’t watch this show!

Anyway, the episode starts off with more of Liz crying. It must be devastating to have to actually play the game now, right? After just being on vacation for 75+ days or whatever it is, to have to actually put some thought into what she needs to say and do in order to stay in the game must be extremely difficult.

And we go from her tears to Austin’s delusions to this making him a hero. Right on, Jesus! Right on. You’ll be forever revered and remembered as a national hero … Continue reading →

Big Brother Recap – 9/7/15

Reality Steve — Mon, 07 Sep 2015 15:35:10 +0000

I’m trying something new for this blog. Instead of drinking while the show was on and being tipsy for my blog, I earned my 60 minutes sober chip while watching the show and flushed it right down the toilet as I’m going to drink while writing my blog. So play a little game with yourself and see if you can tell at what point I started feeling tipsy. I can promise I won’t get drunk at all, because an entire bottle of wine doesn’t do that to me anymore, but the tips will happen, for certain. I say around page 2, paragraph 8, but you never know, I didn’t have dinner tonight so it could be fairly soon.

And also, before I get too tipsy, I wanted to do a bit of self promotion here. I don’t do it too often, but I felt the time was right. And since I am sure I lose a good portion of you before you reach the end of the blog, I figured I’d place it right here, … Continue reading →

Big Brother Recap – 9/4/15

Reality Steve — Fri, 04 Sep 2015 15:28:10 +0000

Oh, Vanessa, stop feeding us some BS lines…we all know that nobody in this world (including those that don’t even watch this show) believe you when you say you think Meg and James are a strong couple. We all know what you really meant, and you even alluded to it right after you said they’re a strong couple when you said you want to get as little blood on your hands as possible. This girl really needs to get over herself. She’s Derrick all over again, an obvious competitor and practicing manipulator who’s playing a game of manipulation with a bunch of mentally challenged folks who just wanted to get on Big Brother for a vacation. I respect the fact that she’s actually thinking out strategy and everything, and honestly believe she’s the only person in the house deserving of the check, BUT I’m annoyed to no end that she even thinks she needs to strategize at this point. It’s almost as if she’s dumber than the other people in the house for believing she … Continue reading →

Big Brother Recap – 8/31/15

Reality Steve — Mon, 31 Aug 2015 05:10:34 +0000

Blah, blah, blah, yet another Sunday night episode where we pick up where we left off on Thursday night, not knowing the HoH…except I DO KNOW WHO THE HOH IS because the damn internet exists and you have live damn feeds that people pay money to use and they find out information and then post it on said internet for all of us to see. Get over yourself, Big Brother, and please end the cliffhanger episodes just so you have a cheap 15 minutes to edit the next episode!

Anyway, in the end it was all four of the jurors and Vanessa hanging on to their ropes for the opportunity to call themselves HoH (or in the case of the jurors, just making it back into the house). And, as Jackie, Shelli, and Becky fell on their @sses and happily made their way out of the backyard, you can see just how all these folks were just happy to make it to jury and get to spend another month or so in vacation mode … Continue reading →

Big Brother Recap – 8/28/15

Reality Steve — Fri, 28 Aug 2015 18:55:04 +0000

This season is another one of those weird seasons where the only person I think deserves to win (Vanessa) is the same person I get mad at other people for NOT getting out! So, if they did get her out, in the end, I’d be pissed because someone who (I felt) didn’t deserve to win the game would win, but if they don’t get her out, I’m going to be mad that they’re idiots leaving her in the game, but then at least somewhat satisfied if she does win. Follow along with that? Anyone else feel the same way? I just don’t understand how nobody else sees how she’s most likely to be the biggest threat in the end, so why keep her in the house? Just put her @ss in jury and let her bitterly vote for whichever one of you losers deserves it the most.

Speaking of nobody aiming to get Vanessa out, we start the episode with the producers speaking through Austin’s mouth, telling us that he’s still considering backdooring her this … Continue reading →

Big Brother Recap – 8/24/15

Reality Steve — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 16:06:58 +0000

It seems that whenever we start Sunday’s episode without knowing who the HoH is, I forget that fact and get a little surprise nugget that there’s still HoH competition left to watch. The reason why I forget that is because I look up who wins HoH on Thursday night and know it the whole weekend and expect to just see the rundown up until the nomination ceremony on Sunday. But, we have to first see who wins HoH, even though I’m sure 75% or more of the people watching the episode already know…

Anyway, before we find out who wins, we get Austin telling us that Vanessa is the biggest target in the house but he’s not sure he wants to be the one to get her out and that someone else should do it. First off, we should just end the episode right there, because I’m pretty sure with the sh!tty foreshadowing that Big Brother does, this is exactly what’s going to happen, but we’ll have to wait to find out won’t we? Second, … Continue reading →