Back on the blog circuit once again! I’ll try my best to be active for as long as possible.
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I haven’t been updating this blog recently, been busy with other things. I’ll try my best to post when I can but other than that, I’ll pretty much be occupied for the time being.
]]>I think the problem is with my attitude. It can get bad.. and I don’t think anyone is going to like someone with a bad attitude. I also think its because I’m dealing with my own problems right now.
Well, mostly problems with myself in general.
I would vent on this post but I don’t want it to get long and boring.
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That is how I feel sometimes. I feel like doing the things I want to do but I am scared since I have no idea whats going to happen. And when I do manage to do the things I want to do, I feel a sigh of relief washing over me.
But, another problem is that when you want to do the things you want to do, you end up in a tight spot. You really want to do the things you have dreamed of doing, or want to do in your life before you get older and it seems like there is something blocking that way to prevent you from doing so.
Sometimes the things I want to do in life, are either derailed because of the things that are blocking me from doing so. (Being scared, Wanting to say something but trying to find the right words, etc.) Or its just my lack of confidence and not being able to do it right away but instead doing other things instead to avoid doing it.
Being an adult is difficult for making decisions on your own. (At least to me anyway) Because you don’t know whats going to happen and you start to freak out and panic and you start to overthink about it and your emotions get in the way.
It also doesn’t help when you worry way too much about it not happening at all.
That’s how life works and.. to be honest, I don’t like having these concerns or worries. It makes me feel unable to stand up and make decisions on my own without feeling that way.
But they are good for worrying about your parents or friends.. Other times.. not so much..
I have those things that I don’t want to remember from a long time ago. They were mostly related to a game called Roblox. Things are fine now but back then, it was different than expected today.
I do not wish to remember them, but they were really out of control. I even tried to defend myself from those situations but I ended up losing those people who were those so called friends.
That may sound wrong, but thats what I believed happend a long time ago. I am no longer friends with those people but its probably for the best that I just find new friends to hang out with.
Even if those people I used to be friends with a long time ago still blame me for whatever I did in the past.
Which is why I keep a close eye on the people I hang out with and make sure they don’t end up crossing the line on my front. Because they don’t want to see me when I get defensive.