The people we lead want to know that we care about them as individuals. They want to know that they matter. They want to know that we are listening to them.

That means listening intently. That means being fully present with what they are saying. That means getting behind their eyes and trying to see the world from their perspective.

The Chinese character for listen, “TING,” captures this spirit of listening.

ugg outlet cabazon coupon 2017 monster-beats-earbuds-review-lawsuit-3 –[if gte mso 10]>

The upper left part of the symbol stands for ear. We use our ear to hear the words the speaker is saying. The lower left hand part of the symbol is for “king” or “dominant one,” indicating that hearing the words through our ear is the most important part of the listening process.

In the upper right hand part of the symbol, we see mind. Our minds help us understand the words the speaker is saying and the message they contain. Below that is eye. Our eyes allow us to see any nonverbal messages the speaker might be sending.

In the bottom right hand side is heart, and above that, the almost horizontal line translates to “one” or “to become of one.” This tells us that if we listen in this way, with our ears, mind, eyes, and heart, we can become of one heart.

I don’t know about you, but this is not the way I was brought up to listen. I’m from New York. Where I grew up, people listen and talk at the same time. So, if you began a sentence, ugg outlet aurora albertville moncler sale hat 2 and I was excited by what you said, I’d jump right into the middle of your sentence with my addition or response. And, you’d feel free to do the same. We’d both be talking and listening and interrupting all at the same time. I did not learn to listen with TING until much later in my life.

Listening with TING enables us to have a much higher quality of conversation and communication. We are engaged in what the other person is telling us. We are deeply listening for their meaning. We bring our hearts, minds, ears, and eyes into the exchange. And we get a much better result.

I’ve been noticing a trend over the last several months.  It’s becoming an epidemic. There’s a lot of self doubt, limiting thoughts, and “how can I be successful in today’s constantly evolving world?” going around.

People who, up until now, were focused, making progress, and moving forward are questioning themselves, their direction, and their ability to reach their goals.

On one level, asking yourself probing questions and questioning “the way you’ve always done it” is a good thing. It’s part of what helps us grow, stay fresh, and innovate. It’s what helps us increase our performance, continually reach higher level goals, and stay relevant in today’s world.

moncler cest pas assez cher down coat “>But when our minds become filled with nfl jerseys cowboys color rush “>self limiting beliefs, negative self talk, and fear—that’s a sure recipe for staying stuck or moving backward.

I love this quote from real estate investor Dolf De Roos:

“The most expensive piece of real estate is the six inches between your right and left ear. It’s what you create in that area that determines your wealth. We are only really limited by our mind.”

That’s the good news.  YOU are the one in charge of your mindset.  You have the ability to control your thoughts, to choose what you believe, to decide what you program into your “six inches between your right and left ear.”  Your mindset will determine your behavior, your level of performance, and your ability to reach your goals. moncler outlet polo 2

moncler doccasion ebay line-height: normal;”>Here are five techniques to develop a mindset that will help you real any goal:

• Decide what you want.  What you really want.  Not what you think you should want, not what anyone else thinks you should want, but what you really want.  That’s the first step.  If you are not really clear about what you’re going after, it will never happen.
  

• Visualize yourself there.  Visualize yourself having the level of success you truly desire.  Visualize achieving your biggest goal. What will it look like, feel like, be like?  How will your life be different?  Marinate in this vision a few times a day. You want to live the experience of it in your mind, in a way that is so real that you experience yourself at that level of success every single day.
  

• Create your ideal day in your mind.  Imagine each moment from the time you wake up until you go to bed. Again, do it in 3-D..with the sights, sounds, smells, feelings.  Relive this ideal day in your mind often, and believe deeply that it is what you are moving toward.
  

• moncler barbel brand “>ugg outlet gold coast germany font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; -moz-font-feature-settings: normal; -moz-font-language-override: normal;”>Think bigger. What thoughts would you need to think, what beliefs would you need to adopt, how big would you need to think to reach your big goals?  Be honest with yourself about whether you are really willing to make these changes.
  

• Let go of what’s not serving you. What thoughts and beliefs would you need to let go of? This is big one. You have to look at what self-limiting beliefs, self-doubt and negative thoughts stand between you and what you want.  And you need to replace them with positive affirmations, positive belief, and excitement about your progress.
  

So what do you think?  Are you willing to make the mindset changes that will take you to what you really want?  Or are you going to limit yourself with thinking that isn’t taking you where you really want to go?

What exactly do I mean by that? Think back to some of the best speakers you have seen. They come up on stage or to the front of the room, and you immediately feel the energy in the room shift. All eyes are on them. They immediately establish rapport and relationship with the people they’re speaking to. Their presence has the audience paying rapt attention to their every word. They “own the room.”

If you regularly attend events and conferences, you know that not every speaker has this ability. Some get up in front of the room, and although they are sharing good information, they really never get to the point where the audience is enthralled with them and totally engaged with their content. ugg outlet florida foxwoods

michael kors outlet shoes “>Mindset to “own the room”

I’m convinced that more than technique, more than mere “stage presence,” there’s an underlying mindset that separates the great speaker from the good speaker—the speaker who sells their idea, their message or their product, and the one who doesn’t—the speaker who captivates their audience and the one who doesn’t.

Often, when I talk to people about this concept, they agree that it’s a great idea, but then their self-doubt kicks in. Their inner critic takes over and they begin to wonder, “Why would someone want to listen to me?” “Am I really good enough and charismatic enough to get in front of an audience?” “Will I be able to get my point across and sell my idea?”

nfl jerseys elite vs limited el paso “>In order to own the room, you need to own your own power! monster beats app aux cable You need to know in the core of your being, at the cellular level, that you have a message that people need to hear, and that you are the perfect person to be delivering that message.

You need to be confident and powerful and grounded in the depth of your expertise. No one else has your unique combination of talents, skills, knowledge, communication style, and life experiences. No one.

When you are in touch with your highest vision of yourself, you step out from that place of power. You speak boldly and confidently. You rock your presentation. You own the room.

ugg outlet atlanta ga a roma sans-serif; font-size: 14px; color: #000000; moncler cluny careers “>Visualize who you want to be the next time you give a speech or deliver a business presentation. See yourself being introduced, walking briskly and confidently to the front of the room, taking a moment to smile, to ground yourself, to make eye contact with your audience, and to take control of the room.

Then visualize the conversation you have with that audience—the relationship and partnership you build with them. See yourself speaking in a laser-focused, dynamic way. Visualize your elation at the end of your program when your audience takes the action you intended for them to take.

See, that’s where it all starts. It starts in your own mind. It starts with owning your own power, stepping boldly into the place where you’re ready to express it, and then sharing it with your audience. That’s how you own the room. And that’s how you become a great presenter or speaker!

Several years ago, my mother spent a couple of days in an emergency room. The overcrowded New York hospital had a bed shortage and was not able to transfer her to a regular room for two days. As I spent time there, I couldn’t help but notice one particular hospital employee.

He came by every couple of hours to empty the trash and mop the floor. He was an older man with curly hair and a huge smile. He’d hum to himself as he worked, and did his work efficiently and effectively.

Each time he came by, he’d spend a few minutes wisecracking with my mother, and flirting with my sister and me. He was a delightful man who clearly enjoyed his job.

“Why is this guy so happy?” I wondered. “His job doesn’t look like much fun. All day, he has to empty trashcans and mop the floor. Maybe he even has to clean the bathrooms. I wonder why he’s so cheerful. nfl jerseys at walmart aliexpress 2 ” I was really puzzled. michael kors card holder c 1004

By the second day, I couldn’t stand it any longer—I had to ask him. “James,” I asked, “your job doesn’t look very fun to me. Yet you walk around singing all day; you talk to people, and you make them laugh. How do you have so much fun mopping the floor?”

The impact of his work

James looked me directly in the eye. He leaned on his mop. He stopped and thought a second. “You don’t understand,” he said. “My job’s about a whole lot more than mopping.” I was all ears. I figured he was going to tell me about some other, more enjoyable duties that I didn’t know were part of his job.

“You see,” he continued, “when people come in here, they’re all stressed out. Something bad happened to them or to someone they care about. They usually don’t know what’s going to happen. I get to make a difference. I get to joke with them, moncler belt bomber or say something nice, or tell them everything’s gonna work out. moncler cluny careers I get to be something good that happens to them today.”

James had spoken to me from his heart. With tears in my eyes, I thanked him. I realized he was the wisest person I’d met in that hospital so far. James knew the impact of his work. He knew the difference he made. He knew how he influenced lives.

What if claims processors in insurance companies focused on the outcome of their work? What if they were reminded that, by doing their job, a woman with breast cancer has her medical bills paid, a family who had a fire in their home gets to rebuild, or the wife of a man who died will be provided for?

What if a prep cook in a restaurant whose task is simply to cut up vegetables was focused on the fact that by doing their job, people were getting wonderfully nutritious food that would give them vibrant energy and health?

What if the people who did the hiring for your company realized that they held the future of your organization in their hands? What if they knew, without a doubt, that your employees are what differentiate you from the competition, and were focused on the difference they made in the organization?

nfl jerseys 2017 online 3 color: #000000;”>What if the people in your department had a clear vision of the impact of their work? This might be how it makes a difference in the world, buy nfl jerseys black and white quiz how it ties in tightly to accomplishing team or company goals, or how it makes a difference to the internal or external customer. Help them see the meaning of their work.

How might you do this?

• Have them talk to customers or clients. Let them hear first-hand the value that their work has.
• Share any information that shows the end use of their product or service.
• Engage them in tying their results to the goals and the bottom line or mission of your organization.

Knowing and valuing the importance of their work increases commitment, increases job satisfaction, and enhances performance. Helping your people see how they make a difference helps you build a culture of success.

It takes a daily commitment to staying focused on the results you want, and engaging in the habits and behaviors that will take you there. It takes saying “no” to excuses, and “yes” to powerful action.

It requires the ability not to get distracted by “bright shiny objects,” and the ability to tune out the people who try to pull you off course.

None of this is easy. Yet all of it is necessary if you want to achieve the success you crave.

So I got to thinking: “What separates the people who are creating massive success from those who flounder and stay stuck?”

And then I found the answer—while watching The Biggest Loser.

2017 nfl jerseys for sale best sellers a michael kors bag sac a main “>On one episode, three former contestants came back to help the trainers work out the three teams.

Marci Crozier, a former contestant who is now healthy, fit, and radiant, challenged the team she was working with to look for their “powerful why.” She explained that being really clear on this “why” would help them stay motivated each day to do what it took.

Brilliant!

Your “why” is your driving force.

It’s what gets you up in the morning. It’s the purpose behind all that you do. It’s the reason you want success in the first place.

It’s what keeps you going when times are great, monster beats cheap charger ugg outlet boots baltimore and helps you be resilient when disaster strikes. It keeps you going when you feel like quitting, and inspires you toward growth and innovation.

Look at the goals you have set for yourself. Then ask yourself, “Why?”
• Why do I want to achieve this?
• How will achieving this enrich my life? Enrich others?
• Why is that important to me?

Then, keep going deeper by asking yourself:
    And why is that important to me? ugg outlet georgia great mall michael kors card holder c 1004 helvetica,sans-serif;”>Then ask–
    And why is that important to me? Then ask-
    And why is that important to me?

As you go deeper and deeper, you’ll begin to get clear on your “powerful why.”

Spend some time on this over the next few days. Get clarity. Know what your “why” is. Then, let it fuel your success!

You see, when you set a bit goal, you have to learn new things, connect with new people, and find new resources. You have to grow and develop and change. You have to become more.

You become bigger. You live more of your potential. You can impact more people. moncler sale hat 2 2017 nfl jerseys for sale best sellers com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/Blog-post-4-300×216.jpg” width=”300″ height=”216″ />

My friend Edie recently reached a goal she’d been working on for two years.

She told me, “I love myself for who I had to become to reach that goal. The end goal wasn’t the big thing. How much did I have to grow, how much did I have to think, how much did I have to change to make that happen? I had to become somebody more than I was in order to reach the goal. ”

monster beats earbuds repair earbuds fake monster beats apple accessories sans-serif; color: #3543a2;”>So what about you?

• What beliefs about yourself and what you can do would you have to let go of in order to go after what you really want?

• Are you willing to change? Going after a big goal absolutely requires that willingness. You can’t get bigger results if you’re not willing to change and grow!

moncler eu eyewear color: #000000; moncler daniel jacket discount “>• Are you willing to ask for help? You’ll need to connect with people who know things you don’t know, and have done things you haven’t done. You’ll have to ask for support. You’ll need to find people to help you along the way.

So, set those big goals. Be willing to change and grow. And watch yourself catapult to new levels of success!

Joanne’s Challenge

Joanne is a bright young manager at an insurance company. She’s been promoted to manage the group where she’d worked. This group has very repetitive work. She approached me after a workshop I delivered.

“How can I get people excited about doing a task I found boring?” she asked. “I sure didn’t enjoy it that much…why should they be enthusiastic about it?”

I encouraged her to continue. “I standardize their work as much as I can to avoid errors, and I tell them exactly how I want them to do it. All they have to do is follow the process I used when I did their job. I try to keep it simple for them. But, when you walk into our work area, it feels depressing. I’m at my wits end. They complain all the time. I’m just not sure what to do to turn it around.”

Her intentions are good. She wants her people to succeed. moncler shirts shoes 2 And, nfl jerseys all teams alibaba she’s going about it the wrong way. Having them do it “her way” takes away the opportunity for her team to be creative, bring their talents to bear on the process, find new solutions, innovate, and be challenged.

The Solution

Joanne would do better to provide her people with clear goals and expectations, and let them find their own path to success.

People need to know what is expected of them. It is our role as leaders to define the end result, to define the outcome. We must work with our people to define clear, challenging goals and objectives. We need to define how results will be measured and rewarded.

Then comes the hard part. We have to set them free to do it their way! We have to let them use their talents, skills, and creativity to get to that end result.

Think about a road trip. As leaders, you define the destination—the required outcome. nfl jerseys elastic sleeves erie pa You also need to set the white lines on the side of the road. This means that you identify any constraints, monster beats b-015 with controltalk cable guidelines, policies, timelines, or standards that must be adhered to. Then, you set them free.

You let them choose their own route and encourage them to do it their way. They are simply required to deliver the agreed to outcome within the parameters you set.

As Joanne began to lead differently, as she drew the white lines on the side of the road and set her team free to apply their best thinking to their jobs, there was a huge shift in their attitudes.

People began to look for improvements to the processes. They began to share new solutions with each other. They felt that their input was valued, and they found new ways to contribute.

Joanne worked with her team to find ways to make the work more interesting. They began to have more fun. Morale improved. People were motivated, they focused on delivering their best, and productivity improved. And, individuals stopped looking for ways to leave the department.

Some of you might be squirming as you read this. You might be feeling that you’d be giving up too much control if you let people do it their way.

moncler diaper bag drake “>ugg outlet deals ugg outlet delaware “>To create a culture of success:

• Develop clear, challenging goals, with a defined end result
• Give people the resources they need to do their work
• Let people know you appreciate and care for them
• Recognize and praise good work
• Provide timely, effective feedback
• Tie rewards to performance
• Create an environment of trust—walk your talk—do what you say you’ll do
• Set people free to do their jobs “their way” within the white lines you’ve painted.

They have the smarts. They have the skills. But they’re spinning their wheels and limiting their own success.

I have a speaking gig tomorrow where I’ll be speaking to women about getting out of their own way, and about taking a leadership role. As I was creating the handout for that session, I decided to put in a page about reclaiming your power and developed ten steps.

Ten Steps

1. Live your life today. Don’t put your life on hold waiting to be something that you’re not. Live your life to its fullest— right now! Don’t wait until “someday,” until you “have it all together,” until “the stars line up.” Today. Now. moncler daniel jacket discount No waiting. ugg outlet fake fort lauderdale

2. Treat yourself with respect and kindness. You will make mistakes. You’re human. Forgive yourself, learn what you can, and move on. Be gentle with yourself. You deserve it. No beating yourself up.

3. Believe in yourself. Give yourself praise. Focus on what you’re doing well. Recognize yourself and feel gratitude for all the good you do- big and small. Make a list of 25 things you’re proud of that you’ve accomplished over the last year.

4. Visualize yourself as a success. Your subconscious mind will act to turn your thoughts and beliefs into your reality. What we believe, we can achieve. Visualization is a powerful tool. Use it daily.

ugg outlet elizabeth nj eagan mn helvetica,sans-serif; ugg outlet de discount code color: #000000;”>5. Develop yourself. Take time out of each day for self development and reflection. Read (or listen to) a motivational message. Be quiet with yourself and/or your spiritual guidance. Grow a little each day. Be willing to have “beginner’s mind.”

6. Choose happiness. Commit yourself to it. It’s your choice. Choose the half full glass instead of the half empty one. I love the quote by Abraham Lincoln, “People are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”

7. Dream big. Acknowledge the power within you. What you can conceive in thought and believe in your heart, you can achieve in your life. Never give up. Go after what you really want. Don’t settle.

8. monster beats vs urbeats speaker Use positive affirmations. It takes only 21 days for something to become a habit. Combining visualization and affirmations will take you into the future you desire. moncler backpack bady

9. Discover your unique purpose. Finding your purpose or passion can be something that adds amazing focus and power to your life. Everything falls into place. Everything makes sense. Your actions are focused on the difference you want to make in the world.

10. Remember that you’re unique. No one else can do what you do in the way you do it. Confidently share who you are. Live juicy. Tell your truth. Stand in your power.

So which of these steps speaks to you? Is there more than one?

I’d know what the end result was that I wanted, but didn’t know all of the steps it would take to make it happen. So I’d get overwhelmed, I’d stall, and I wouldn’t do what it took to get to my goal.

Then I had an interesting thought. I just had to turn on my headlights! Let me tell you what I mean.

Let’s say you were driving in the evening from Los Angeles to San Francisco. If you took US 101, it would be about a 430 mile drive. Now, you would not be able to see all 430 miles of that road. In fact, once you pulled out of your driveway and turned on your headlights, michael kors dress shirts val deurope you’d only be able to see about 180 feet in front of you. nfl jerseys dallas cowboys ebay

Yet, we don’t let that stop us. We don’t get paralyzed by fear. We don’t sit there and worry, “What’s going to happen when I get to the end of this 180 feet—I won’t be able to see anything!?!” No, we simply drive the illuminated section of the road, and trust that when we get to the end of the part that’s lit, the next section of road will be illuminated as we move forward. And that’s how we do the whole 430 miles—180 feet at a time!

The “Best Case Scenario”

I realized that this was exactly what I needed to do with my business goals! I needed to set the goal, lay out the steps I could see in front of me, and trust that as I got toward the end of the part that was clear to me, the next steps would become evident. And they always do! michael kors backpack wallet 2

moncler arriette aspen sans-serif; font-size: 14px; color: #000000;”>I like to begin by asking myself “What’s the best case scenario?” And then I figure out the first step to take me in that direction. And I do that step. Then, I determine what’s next and do that. I keep moving in the right direction.

It can work the same way for you. You do what you can in the part you can see, and trust that when you get to the end of the part that’s illuminated, you’ll see the next part of the path…the next step on the journey. That’s the way it works. 180 feet at a time.

Everything does not have to be perfect before you start! You don’t have to know every single step you’ll take. Waiting for that is a recipe for staying stuck, a recipe for never moving toward your big goals.

moncler jacket acorus font-size: 16px; color: #3543a2;”>Here are a few tips:

nfl jerseys ranked custom helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; color: #000000;”>1. Set big goals. Don’t worry if you don’t know every step you need to take to reach them. Just “turn on your headlights,” and do what’s in front of you.

2. Be willing to change. It’s impossible to reach a big goal without learning and growing, and becoming even more. Get ready to grow!

3. Celebrate your successes along the way. It helps build momentum and excitement.